fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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