so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
