Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize