it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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