I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
