I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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