Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
