Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize