One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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