I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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