I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
