Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
