this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
