he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
That's when you crack a 10am beer
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
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