So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
