How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize