I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
