Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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