Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Randomize
