Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
