angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Randomize
