The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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