the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
