too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
