She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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