I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize