I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Randomize
