Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
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