I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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