who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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