Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
wat bout pragnant strippers??
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
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