he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
