what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize