I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
