How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
