Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
