Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
