so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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