actually, I'm a sock model
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
