sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Randomize
