is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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