cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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