you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
