I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
