We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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