do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
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