remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
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