I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
