i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
