After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
